H-O-P-E

By Alina Berezovskaya 

P.S. I will not post this on my professional social media account, as it is still too close to my heart.

If my experience and words have touched you, feel free to share it with anyone and everyone. Spread hope.

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The photos above is the cake that I have created

SUNDAY

20.02.2022

On Sunday 20th of February 2022, I finished a cake. I created it for myself. I didn’t have a client, a concept, an idea, a reason. I just made it. I called it “HOPE”. A name without any explanation. I thought about it a lot… Why? No answer.

One of the first lessons I learned in art school is: always have a reason for whatever u design, paint, create, draw. And I always followed that lesson. This is the first time I have created something without any reason. 

Little did I know … 

MONDAY

21.02.2022

On Monday 21st of February 2022, I flew to Kiev, Ukrain. Why? Just because I missed my boyfriend, who lives there. Just because I wanted to spend time with him. Have some fun. I didn’t think about my parents, my relatives, my friends. Why would I consider the feelings of my best friend Danielle in Singapore? Or my childhood friend Varya in Malaysia? Just another trip, right… One of the many. Just like everyone else I didn’t believe a war between relatives could happen. I choose to live in a peaceful and a happy world. I don’t even watch the news. And I still don’t. I personally will not be able to stay sane knowing what’s going on on our planet. How sane are you, really, right now? Right this moment?

WEDNESDAY

23.02.2022

I updated my website, while waiting for my boyfriend to finish work. Lovely dinner with delicious modern Ukrainian cuisine dinner. At a restaurant where I went with my best friend for my 33rd birthday celebration just before Covid happened. I must say, I already miss Covid days now. #stayhome #staysafe. Home was safe… is it now? It was face masks. Now it is bombs and guns… 

THURSDAY

24.02.2022

On Thursday 24th of February 2022, we woke up at 5 am with the sound of “fireworks”. At this time the news said nothing. Alexandra, my friend in Cyprus texted me and said to leave Ukraine now. I started to look for the first flights out… COVID-19 entry requirements at those countries … prices, visa issues, etc.. 

Then we heard the airport was bombed as a military object… we called the airport, they didn’t respond. The website didn’t update … 

We ordered Uber towards Lviv, a town in west Ukrain. No luck. So we ordered Uber towards Zhytomyr (a town on the way to Lviv). A car accepted. I packed my suitcase to leave behind (I’m coming back, right?), a small bag to take with us. Took a shower. All of that 15 minutes. A small bag had all of our chargers, electronics, tea bags, paper towels, cherry tomatoes. What’s the logic? Who knows. All my jewellery is left in Kyiv. 

Uber came. Drivers are not allowed to leave Kyiv. We offered money. More money. More. Cash. Euros. Dollars. No. 

All of a sudden a friend is in front of us. With a taxi car. Going to the outskirts of Kyiv to his brother’s house. His driver accepts to drive us to Zhytomyr after. Wow, great. 

Traffic, traffic, traffic. Petrol stations have lines that will take 3 hours to pass. We arrive. The driver now tells us he is not allowed to leave Kyiv (in Kyiv every taxi driver has a boss). What a surprise. We stay at our friends house. We decide to wait out this short “conflict”. Get food and drinks, have a good time. Eat all those things we never allow ourselves. Crisps and more crisps in my case.

All day I searched for transport. Train websites down. Bus websites down. Car pool website has a car for a second and than it’s gone. No luck. 

Supermarkets close… When will they open? Tomorrow? Next week?

FRIDAY

25.02.2022

Bombs wake us up in the morning. At this point Uber and Bolt is no longer active in Kyiv. We order through some other app. A driver somehow happens to be in our village. We didn’t shower. Didn’t eat. Didn’t brush our teeth. Jumped in the car and left. 

We were supposed to go to our appartment, arrange our thoughts, have breakfast, and decide on the plan out. Instead, on the ride to Kyiv decided to go to the train station. If we can’t find a car, may be we can find a train? Fast decions. No planning. Right here and right now. This is completely opposite of my nature. I like to plan 1 year ahead. 

Complete shock. Endless amount of people standing like zombies without any understanding of what’s going on, where to go, what to do. I realize that there is no chance to find a way out without help. I start talking to people. Where to go, what to do. Taking everyone’s phone numbers to call each other with news, ideas, solutions. And I never talk to strangers… If I see someone I know in the street, I would probably cross on the other side… Someone tell me there are trains. We don’t need tickets. We just jump it. But where ? What time? When u r in shock, u can’t think clearly. I looked at the schedule (a giant wall) for 10 minutes without managing to read a simple arrival time and city name… I’ve been to over 30 countries. Train stations and airports is like my home. It usually takes me seconds to understand the way… 

We go out on the platforms. My boyfriend says let’s jump to any train heading west. We speak English between each other and Russian with other people. Looking for trains and trying to understand where they go. A girl with two friends and a 2-year old baby comes by and asks if we speak Russian and English and can help her understand something. Her name is Sarai. Economics student from Ecuador. 19 years old. Only done 2 semesters in Kiev. She told me later she will not come back to finish her education. 

Sarai told us that there is a train at 13:00, from platform 3. Some people who know some people caught a train at 7 am at platform 3 and said there will be one more at 13:00. I call all my new “friends” to let this know. They follow with their discoveries. No cars. Busses are full. We decide to wait for the train. By this time we already have an international group of people from all over the world around us. 

We wait, talk, become friends… I hope we meet again over a cup of coffee or better a delicious home cooked meal… 
All shops are closed. No food. No drinks. We couldn’t even buy a bottle of water. Imagine, you are in Paris… or London… or New York… at the main train station… Or an airport in Dubai? Tokyo may be? And you can’t even find a sip of water? Kyiv is the capital of Ukrain. Ukrain is the largest country in Europe. 

At 11:00 we hear sirens, everyone is running. Where? Why? We run too. We thought it’s the bombing. Who knows. I choose to believe it wasn’t. Ignorance is bliss. 

We see a train at platform 1. We are at 3. How to get there? A rational person would have checked the path in advance… Stairs, more stairs… we literally push ourselves into the last wagon of the train. 

There wasn't any train at 11:00 in the schedule… Where did it come from?

At some point it becomes so hot in the train. Windows are locked and sealed with silicone. It’s winter, makes sense. The train is triple overfull with luggage, people, children, pets… we are at wagon 9. Nine! The last one. Someone from literally the end of the train walked all the way to the front to ask for a key to unlock the windows. He unlocked each window in each wagon. Just to understand what he had to go through… let’s say everyone in the train barely drunk water not to go use the bathroom. Because it’s literally almost impossible to pass. That is how full is the train. This guy helped everyone on that train with his walk/crawl/climb through the whole train and back. Im sure he literally stepped on some people…

We arrived at 21:00. From Kyiv to Lviv. The trip usually takes 6 hours. We stand, seat, stand, seat, switching between each other for 10 hours. We asked for some water from our neighbours. Students from Morocco who study medicine in Kharkov. Will they come back to finish their education? We share a bottle of water. Covid precautions? Not today. 

When I called Canadian embassy in Kyiv… And I quote “You should not depend on the Government of Canada to help you leave the country.”

Cyprus government said they will organise a bus “avrio”. Meaning tomorrow in greek. I am still waiting for a phone call… Surprised much?

Our friend from Latvia contacted us. Her name is Rita. She found a bus Latvian embassy organised to evacuate their citizens. Rita called the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and convinced them to take us too. Did we believe it? I can tell you now, in that chaos, not really. She said they have accommodation and food. She made sure we know it. Took action! I still don’t believe it.

We arrived in Lviv at 21:00. At 22:00 starts military curfew. Do you know what that means? I don’t. But as Covid has taught us it means u gotta stay home. Home… The Latvian bus to the border leaves at 6:00. There is also a train to Poland at 1:00. Train is sooner, but will we manage to stand another 10 hours, this time without any sleep? We call hotels to find a place to sleep few hours. No one even picks up. The hostel where the Latvian people are meeting said they are fully booked and then again didn’t pick up. We called 5 times. We decide to go there anyway. Quick decisions. It would take taxi 30 minutes to pick us up due to, again, traffic. We walk towards the car…

We ask the driver to take us to the border… But his car is electric. He calls his friends. Doesn’t find anyone. We thought if there is nothing out there, there is still time to go back to the train station and we will spend the night there. A roof is a roof. 

We arrive in the middle of nowhere in darkness without any lights… and we see a bus… yellow bus! The government of Latvia has organised 3 busses to take everyone. And by everyone I mean any nationality. Applause. We found water there and shared the last piece of bread. Boarded the bus and left Lviv at 23:00. I cried because I was happy. 

SATURDAY

26.02.2022

We arrive in Uzhgorod, the border crossing to Slovakia, at 4 am. We drove with police escort on the opposite side of the road. We didn’t get locked in the traffic. We hear that at this time border with Poland is so overflown with people, that it would take minimum 48 hours to pass. Slovakia is the new way “out”. 

We passed the border at 19:00. That’s 22 hours in the bus. I consider ourselves very lucky. This was the easy way. Like 5* stay with breakfast in bed. Fellow passengers shared their food with us. 

While waiting at the border, we see that a toilet arrived. A car full with wood. Food supplies. It became obvious that this may take a while. So many women, with kids. Buses with kids only. Very few men, all above 60 I guess. Everyone else must to go to war and fight now. I heard that Ukrain government called for women to fight as well. Women. Women who bring children into the world. How? Why? What? I cannot comprehend this. 

A friend of a friend came to pick us up at the border. Jaro came in the morning. He waited all day for us. Who would have thought it would take so long? Lovely Saturday. There are 2 sides at a border. Ukrainian officials checked our passports 10 times, to allow us to leave the country. To enter European Union (aka Slovakia) it took us less than an hour. Big strong Slovak army men welcomed us. One of them said he served in Afghanistan before. The kindest eyes I have ever seen, with so much empathy, compassion and warmth in his heart. 

Jaro drove us to Kosice. We stoped at the supermarket to buy a change of clothes, joking that this new level of “stinky” brought our relationship to a new level. Suzy, our Slovak friend in Cyprus have asked her parents to shelter us. I cried again when I saw the shower. Delicious dinner, and so full of love from these wonderful people we have just met. The most amazing breakfast in the morning. I will never forget it.

SUNDAY

27.02.2022

Early rise, early shine. At 9 am we already had bus tickets to Krakow. And from Krakow plane ticket to Paphos. Home. We were going home.

I was really not able to think, so asked my mum to buy us bus and plane tickets. At the bus station we realise that the bus tickets are for 27 March.

We start looking again for a new way, with rush and worry as we are so used to now. At the train station I see a girl, we ask her something about the schedule, in English of course. Natalie says she only speaks Ukrainian and Russian. And she is also looking for a way to go to Krakow. Straight away I said she is coming with us. She kept crying, and I kept hugging her, telling her not to worry and we will take care of her now.

Suzy found us another bus. Her wonderful dad drove us to another bus station. We said goodbye and were on our way. Only 6 hours in the bus this time. Easy time.

Today is Sunday. One week has passed. My life will never be the same again. The whole world will never be the same again.

STORY OF NATALIE

Natalie is from Nikolayev. Her mum and sister are there now. She lives in Kyiv with a flatmate. When the situation escalated her flatmate left with her relatives. Natalie was left alone. She called everyone she knows, everyone already has left Kyiv. She found a ride with her classmate. Her classmates mum drove them for 2 days to Lviv. A trip that usually takes 7 hours. She slept 2 hours one night and 4 hours the second night. She left them at the border. She didn’t pass to Slovakia with them. She can’t go home either because the bridge was bombed. 

Natalie and her friend waited for 10 hours at the border, in Ukraine’s winter cold. She watched as mothers with babies passed in front of her. They take priority. She understands that. She is ashamed to think that it’s not fair. That is how exhausted and scared she is. 

Volunteers at the border drove her to Kosice, Slovakia. Natalie is going to Krakow, Poland. At a friend of a friend house for a week. Then she plans to go back home to Ukraine. She has little amount of money with her. 

We took her with us. We bought her a sandwich and a coffee. Paid the bus fare.

We said goodbye at Krakow airport. A friend of a friend will pick her up from there. We gave her some money. We agreed to meet after the war. Her mum is a chef and makes the best sirniki. A breakfast dish my boyfriend came to love in Ukraine. Will she really have ever the opportunity to go back home? Will it be the same home she loves so much?

I don’t speak Ukrainian. Most Ukrainians don’t speak English. When you speak Russian to them, they reply in Ukrainian. I don’t understand Ukrainian. I ask them to speak Russian. With tension in their voice they speak Russian with me. Because I ask for help.

I was born in Russia. My grandfather is Ukranian. I live in Cyprus. I also lived in United Kingdom, France, Canada and Austria. I am a citizen of 3 countries. I speak 4 languages. When someone asks me where I am from, I reply “international”. My friends are literally from all over the world. My boyfriend is from Syria. He tells everyone he is from Lebanon because he is ashamed to be labeled as a refugee who came here with a boat. His family lives in Sweden. They traveled through 5 countries to get there. They are the kindest sweetest people you can ever meet. They don’t hate anyone. And they welcome everyone.

I write my story in the plane on the way home. The last mode of transport on this journey. To safety. To the known. To the secure. My mum will meet us, with all the delicious favorite food… how precious is this? How we tend to undervalue most valuable and overvalue the least valuable… 

I consider this human experience much grander than going to Antarctica 8 years ago. I went alone. I considered that journey to be life changing. Antarctica cost me a fortune. Get out of Ukrain was free. Humbled by everyone who helped with what they could in this time of crises. Not with money. We had money. People helped with advice, food, water, contact, idea… the biggest cost was 17 euro each for Covid test at Cyprus airport. Welcome home. 

I feel utmost gratitude to our families and our friends who helped, supported, prayed and worried for us during this time. Words can not express it.

Refugees are already here. People are here.

They left their home to safety 10 years ago, 5 years ago, last year, today, tomorrow, next year.

There is always a conflict somewhere in the world.

Always someone is left without a roof, without family, without security… always someone needs help. 

Do you know how many ongoing conflicts there are in the world right now?

A glass of water is help. A hug. A ride. A sandwich. 10 euro. A place to sleep. A face mask. A kind word. A contact. 50 euro. A bag of groceries. A coffee. A shared hotspot internet. A shower. A tissue. Whatever u can possibly manage right now for someone may actually become their unforgettable moment. For a person in need, despair, fear. A moment that can change life. A moment that can give H-O-P-E. 

If you choose to help with money at this moment, but don’t know where. You can send the money directly to Alina.

If you want to donate. If you know someone who needs help.

Please share. I find that the best was to share information is to write a personal message. I personally have noticed that a message to 5 people will receive more impact than a post share on Facebook with 500 friends. To write a personal message to 30 persons, it takes me 30 minutes. 

Take a break in your busy day. Help someone. 

P.S. I will not post this on my professional social media account, as it is still too close to my heart.

If my experience and words have touched you, feel free to share it with anyone and everyone. Spread hope.